Getting Out Of Your Own Way Tip #14
We are nearing the end of this blog post series and I have had fun and learned a lot. I hope you have too.
From Blind Spots To Living Your Truth
We started by becoming aware of our blind spots and embarrassment about them, realized our innocence, found willingness to meet our blindspots, learned to say Hello instead of Go Away, got in touch with the solvent called Kindness and Love, shifted our focus away from the problems, befriended our shame, turned around blame, allowed our resistance, touched in on the Field of Possibilities, began Feeling Gratitude, acknowledged what is Good about us, and finally got curious about our Deep Longing so we can live from our deepest Truth, freely flowing through us – as you and me.
That’s quite a ride in only 14 days, and it is perfectly OK if you feel a little jet lagged and need time to catch up with yourSelf.
Since yesterday’s blog post took us deeper into the longing and it’s qualities, today we’ll finish up this series with grounding into our Divine Qualities. And with that we’ve moved from getting out of our own way to …
Getting Inside Your Own Unique Way
Once we dip into ourSelves through meditation and mindfulness practices, we get to know first hand what these qualities of our Essence are in our own experience. The more we dip in, the more familiar they become and the easier it is to recognize those qualities as a green sign letting us know we are on the right track.
Knowing these qualities helps us get out of the confusion and doubt that we’ve been accustomed to, by unconsciously ‘getting in our own way’ for so long. Then it is a matter of learning to recognize them, trust them and follow them. This can be a lifelong process, well worth every step.
Water Qualities
When you dive into water, you’ll feel the qualities of H2O: Wet, fluid, flexible, buoyant and smooth.
Divine Qualities
When you dive into the Divine, you’ll notice It’s unique qualities, such as Peace, Purity, Stillness, Love, Joy, Oneness, Clarity, Expansion and so many more. These are the cues letting us know that we are in touch with our Essence and help us tune into this new language when we need to make new choices.
If we are motivated by fear, comparing, competing, greed or jealousy, you’ll notice what is missing!
This is your clue that you are not connected within and need to shift if you want to move from Essence.
If you feel inspired, happy, enthusiastic, harmonious, grateful etc, you’ll know that you are connected.
For me it is an ongoing process of learning and trusting these qualities, and one of the biggest boulders and lessons I’ve had to deal with. It’s been a matter of learning to trust what I already Know or Feel to actually be true. Self doubt was my middle name most of my life, so it has taken me a long time and a lot of in deep work (Lots of Hello’s and Allowing) to get to trust my Heart and the qualities I mentioned here. I’ve had to learn to trust that more than believing my mind or what others say and do.
How Can I Trust This?
This was a common question on my journey Home before I developed enough discernment to know/Feel the difference between projection, Truth or something my mind made up.
I had a lot of allies in my life whom I would ask for support when in doubt.
Becoming a Hakomi Therapist really helped me more than anything I’d been involved with before (or after, for that matter). The learning environment was such that we would get instant feed back about ourselves or others when we practiced our skills. We had permission to make mistakes and fumble around to help us find deeper truths inside.
The only pressure to do it perfectly right away, was coming from the inside – from a misinformed identity who only thought s/he was lovable if s/he were perfect! Saying Hello to that identity and Listen to it helped it soften and made space to explore, grow and find deeper and deeper truths. Once the pressure to perform was off, the playground was open to new explorations and possibilities.
Hakomi
Hakomi is all about getting to know yourSelf at very deep levels underneath the masks, character styles, traumas and conditionings we took in as little sponges when we grew up. I could not Be who I am today without the immense support from my Hakomi trainers, therapists and peers and I highly recommend that you surround yourself with a support person or team in finding your own Truth and Flow.
It is so important to Feel deeply in your body what it Feels like to Be in the Flow or not. It is not a head/mind/conceptual thing. Once you get familiar with the Feeling and Qualities of the Divine, you will Feel confident, clear and calm about life and your purpose and you won’t be afraid to stand out as different or unique.
Go Ahead – Make Mistakes!
Why would you be afraid? You are fully backed up from within and know you are allowed to make mistakes because you can course-correct any time to get back into alignment.
Even though I haven’t mentioned perfection as one of the boulders that get in our way, I think you get it from this post. Be bold – be willing to make mistakes. Mistakes make us wiser, stronger and more capable when we are willing to learn from them
Tip #14
Start Or Expand On Your Meditation Practice To Get To Know Your Divine Qualities
Spend time inside to get to know what they Feel like. Do whatever it takes to learn to trust them. Get help. Get support. Be willing to make mistakes and be willing to check for confirmation from others as long as you need it.
Your Flow is strong and vibrant and you will start recognizing Its Qualities as your true Guide the more you dive into those Waters.
Go over the qualities mentioned we mentioned here and use them as green arrows to follow when you Feel them. It IS a new language we are learning and it takes time and practice.
Meditation And Mindfulness Course
If you are new to meditation and want to start, I am offering the Meditation and Mindfulness course that I have taught at UCSC for over 8 years now for half off till the end of the year. When you go to check out, just put the word Welcome in the Promo code and you’ll automatically receive the discount of $50. You can read more about it here.
Of course, if you are not new to meditating, you can still greatly benefit from these meditations to get more embodied and more experienced in meeting all of who you are with a kind Hello!
Need A Little Help?
If you have missed the beginning of this Blog series, you can go to the first blog post How to Get Out of Your Own Way and move forward from there.
If you feel a little lost in all these tips and would like some support, you can always sign up for a free 30 min Discovery Session with me or get support from my books or downloads
My latest free book Five Steps to Dive into the Divine Feminine Flow is available in the sidebar to the right.
Let me know how you are doing with these Tips. I’d love to hear from you!
It’s easy to forget that those Divine Qualities are actually who you ARE! If you feel lost in qualities that seem opposite of what we’ve talked about in this article, don’t be afraid to reach out. Reaching out and Receiving is very Divine too!
You can learn more about my work as a Self-Love Mystic & Mentor at Divine Feminine Flow. Feel free to contact me for a free 30 min. Discovery Session to learn if my Self Love Mentoring can help you make this transition into your Heart. Or, a really good way to start and learn a little more about what I do, is to download my free e-book, 5 Steps To Dive Into The Divine Feminine Flow
I so enjoyed reading your post today Pernilla. I do feel it is SO important to give our Self permission to play and make mistakes. We learn through trail and error, so allowing our Self to error gives us the freedom to experiment! Your Hakomi Therapy sounds very powerful! Knowing one’s self at the deepest level, allows us to truly know all of who we are and to heal/ shift all that is not aligned with Unconditional Love. I’m sure you make a huge difference in the lives of many. YOU and your work sound so healing.
Oh, isn’t that the truth. If we can’t ‘make misteaks’ we can’t learn and grow. Let’s keep giving everybody permission to ‘make misteaks’ because in reality there are no mistakes. There is only trying out things to find out what works or what happens. It turns out that Life is one Grand Stage where we can play and have fun, fall and get up, and learn what really resonates with us.
Where on earth this this perfection-thing come from??
Blessed Be
ALL Love,
Pernilla
I have never heard of hakomi before. I would like to experience the feeling of complete alignment with Divine Flow. If this is a form of meditation I expect it would be very helpful in shifting my awareness.
Kim, I wish a meditation could bring that about. No, Hakomi is really a way of moving through all the layers that stand in the way of the Flow, and it is done in a deeply honoring, safe, non-violent way to make Space for ALL of who we are. That is the process of unraveling the false beliefs and identities we took on and they will only change and transform in a safe loving environment. That is what I Love most about the Hakomi work.
That said, though, it is not uncommon to Feel that Flow every time when we let go of the beliefs that we need to be different than we are and finally allow ourselves just to Be Here Now.
It is a process, as I am sure you know, to keep deepening into the Flow until all the things that have taken our attention away from the Flow are not at the forefront anymore because we have helped them dissolve by our mere allowing vs resisting.
Luckily, it gets easier and easier as we keep melting through the layers and one day, you’ll suddenly notice that you Rest more in the Flow than fighting yourself outside of the Flow.
Hakomi has helped me shift more than anything in this lifetime – and it was a process that has taken years – well worth every step.
More and more, I am seeing how much of what I believe about myself is just a story that I made up to explain the events that happened to me. Once I see it for the story that it is, it no longer has the power to control my life, although it can be challenging to choose a different way of being. The work has been hard at times, but so worth it. At 47, I finally feel like I am living my life the way I want to. That is incredibly freeing.